Stay away from the “should’ve, could’ve, would’ve” thinking here. Maybe you even start getting angry at yourself for not saying or doing anything! Your anger and frustrations grow even though the person and event are long gone. Even if you don’t respond, you may sit with your thoughts and feelings about this. What might happen in this situation? Maybe you continue to get angry and feeling attacked so you say something or do something back to this stranger. You may even feel attacked or unsafe (consequences). You begin to grow frustrated and get angry. You start to tell yourself “People should say they are sorry when they bump into others,” “That guy looked menacing and meant to bump into me,” or “He is disrespectful!” (beliefs about the event). You are walking down the hallway and someone bumps into you, looks briefly at you in an “odd” way, and continues walking (activating event). How do you feel about the event based on your thinking patterns and self-talk?ĭ-Dispute-Examine your beliefs and expectations? Are they realistic? Are they rational? Or are they maladaptive? The theory is, if we change our interpretation or thoughts on the event, we may change our feelings and behaviors toward the event.Ī-Activating Situation or Event-This is the actual situation or event that occursī-Belief system about the activating event-What are you telling yourself about the event? What are your beliefs and expectations of how others should carry themselves?Ĭ-Consequences-Or rather emotional consequences about the event. Ultimately, we study the events that occur and then dispute or challenge our perspectives, sometimes replacing them with more realistic or more rational beliefs. It originates in the idea that our perception of a situation or event combined with our beliefs and self-talk about the event is what leads to our feelings on the event. The model is a way of guiding us to identify the source of our angry feelings and then changing or challenging our thinking to make these feelings more manageable or to alter what is being experienced. The A-B-C-D model comes out of rational emotive therapy. This installment will focus on the A-B-C-D model which is a way of examining anger causing events in your life and reframing your thinking around these events.
ABCD MODEL SERIES
Read below for part 3 in our ongoing series on anger.